Tears in Heaven…

Ah yes…it IS that time of year again in 8th grade! The convergence of spring (and its accompanying fever) with the Production (and its intense sharing / clashes of creative ideas and energy) with letters from high schools (both exhilarating as well as terribly disappointing) with the burgeoning awareness that our three years together at SGS are careening to an end can be rather overwhelming to even the most stalwart of 8th graders. (Woah…these girls have learned how to write run-ons from the best!!) Fact is, our Friday drew to a close amid an impressive display of tears and tension, and I can only imagine that a few members of our 8th grade community might well have continued to let down once they made it to the psychic safety of home. We have reached an emotionally charged and tender time in 8th grade, to be sure…and while it’s fairly common, it’s always somewhat difficult. Each girl will respond in her own individual manner – from what seems like high drama to little or no outward reaction on any given day. Three common behaviors we see or hear about are:

• a certain emotional malaise or listlessness that sometimes manifests itself in a lack of motivation or attention to academic details. Grades slip, homework is neglected, assignments are not turned in on time…that kind of thing.

• surliness, “attitude,” generally rude behavior – (this usually occurs at home, thank goodness for us!!) – which can make parents wonder just where they went wrong!! Fact is, outward displays of anger and moodiness often mask inward sensations of real sadness. A quote that carried me through my three children’s teen years was “A child needs the most love when she’s the least loveable!” At this juncture, JUST LISTENING is an amazingly effective antidote – if you’re able to pull that off!

• tears, accompanied by dramatic declarations like “I’m the ONLY one who didn’t get into School X…” or “Everyone is going to Y…” or “How come I NEVER X,Y,Z….” Whenever you hear red flag words like “everybody, nobody, always, never, all, none, only…” take note of what feelings lie right below the surface. I always found it interesting, if not downright amazing to note that the body processes any intense emotion (good or bad) as stress! That went a long way to explain why a girl who seemed to have the world by the tail was almost as flummoxed as one who was grappling with a barrage of challenging issues.

In the days to come we as an 8th grade community will be processing individual feelings as well as examining group dynamics. We’ll do some writing in our Curiosità Journals and will undoubtedly engage in some small and large group discussions and activities designed to both defuse mounting tensions as well as hone much needed interpersonal tools as we prepare for high school and beyond. …All this as we generate an original, full-length feature film!!